Just for Fun Friday: The Stand-Up Economist

I feel bad about only posting stuff like this without real content, but it isn't that I haven't been writing. I just haven't been happy enough with the final product to post it comfortably.

Anyway, a video for your enjoyment:

Just for Fun Friday: When She Broke English

Yesterday, a wonderful and awful thing happened: this piece of overwrought high middle school scribbling was published over at Thought Catalog. It's not just that it's bad -- it's that it is so terrible that one has to wonder if it's actually satirical commentary on the state of American education. A sample:

When she closed her eyes sometimes she could smell him, his pungent body odor, the way she possessed it when their blushing bodies rubbed together in awkward embrace, her soft fleshy thigh against his, his flushed chest against her beating breast. She remembered most the heavy weight of his naked body when he shuddered against her, relaxed his muscles, and eased into her torso, those rare moments where the whole world fell away and they became nothing more than each other, an ugly fleshy mass of hair and limbs that was her primal perfection. Then they would sit for hours, nude, absorbed in nothingness, and those were the moments she loved best. She would feed him cheese on crackers and he would turn to her with an expression of complete surprise; it was in those moments that it seemed like he had only just laid his eyes on her for the first time, and while he was momentarily absorbed in a rapt wonderment she would gorge herself on his love.

The unintended consequences of abstinence only sex ed: torso sex. With cheese and crackers.

I could go on for hours, but you really should just read it in its entirety. Additionally, I highly recommend the dramatic reading of this literary monstrosity, as performed by Ms. Emily Crockett:



Remember kids: don't play Mad Libs with a thesaurus. It's not a toy.

Have a good weekend!

bellum medicamenti delenda est

Just for Fun Friday: S*** My Students Write

In the early days of the mass interwebs--ie, the mid-90s--there were a lot chain emails that got forwarded into everyone's inbox. If you're like me and have older friends and family members, you probably still get them now and again--I just hope yours don't include insane conspiracy theories about Obama or how the Mexicans are invading to take arr jerbs. Anyway, one of the emails that would get forwarded pretty frequently was a list of horribly written or otherwise hilarious excerpts from student tests or papers.

It turns out, someone finally decided to make this a Tumblr, called Shit My Students Write.

One of my favorites:

Keeping it real with that birth thing.

Before, women were multifunctioning objects around the house that could do that birth thing but now women are running corporations and writing great literature all the while still doing that birth thing.

Yes, yes, it's sad that kids today don't have the language skills they should. But having been a teaching assistant in a foreign policy class meant for upperclassmen and thus seen my share of terrible writing and attempted academic bullshittery, it's something you just have to laugh at.

Say goodbye to your afternoon productivity.

Just For Fun Friday

WOW.



Via @notjessewalker

Just for Fun Thursday

Man, sometimes the Onion just hits a little too close to home.


I'm Only Really Happy When I'm Writing, Or When I'm Having Lots Of Fun With My Friends And Family

Ouch.

Just for Fun Friday: Libertarian Cheat Sheet

There was much ado on the Twitters this week about what conservatism is, thanks to patently false comments by Jim DeMint, because people tend to lump all conservatives together as if they all believe the same thing.

Similarly, people often think of libertarians as having a monolithic way of thinking, but this could not be further from the truth. Indeed, to paraphrase Brian Doherty's book Radicals for Capitalism, if two libertarians agree on something, one invariably will accuse the other of selling out.

To clear this up, then, I've put together a short list of the many kinds of libertarians so you can tell us apart:

Catoites: Associated with the Cato Institute, typically urbane libertines. Work in a giant greenhouse. Often mistaken for Republicans, but indeed they are too principled.

Reasonoids: Associated with reason magazine, typically libertine urbanites with an aversion to professional attire and a penchant for Johnny Cash impersonators.

CEIers: Convinced that the polar bear floating down the Potomac was just a hallucination brought on by delerium tremens. Remedy: more drink.

Classical Liberals: aging ex-hippies familiar with Latin, Greek and/or the Western Canon.

Randians/Objectivists:Making the principled argument for selfishness since 1957. They believe in objective truth as told by Rand, so they are very much like fundamentalist Muslims though thankfully they're too self-absorbed to blow themselves up.

Paulistas: A cult of personality much like the Randians but lack any cognizable sense of humor. They are best known for driving flame-traffic on websites that criticize the great and powerful Ron.

Liberaltarians: The one group in America that can legitimately blame Obama for their unemployment.

Beckians: Nominal libertarians but de facto conservative populists whose manifesto pines for the day when America was collectively at the height of its irrationality and bloodlust as we entered the anger stage of the grief process. (No, really.) Also, they seem to believe Jesus wrote the Constitution.

Constitutionalists: Lawyers and legal types who take the Constitution much more seriously than the Founders ever did. They seem to believe that Madison was Jesus.

Austrian Economists: Economists who hate math.

Chicago Economists: Economists who hate English.

Anarchists: Statists who've never been mugged.

Minarchists: Anarchists with commitment issues.

Seasteaders: Anarchists (on a boat!) who've never been marauded by pirates.

There you go. So the next time you're navigating a room full of drunk libertarians, this little cheat sheet will give you a good idea of what kind of person you're dealing with.

Have a good weekend!

bellum medicamenti delenda est.

What, there's a difference?

A funny website I just found about one of the pains of owning an iPhone: Damn You, Auto Correct.

But I don't get this one...

Tomato, to-mah-to.

bellum medicamenti delenda est.

Old and Busted: Situational Constitiutionalism

New hotness: Cafeteria Constitutionalism-- n. the act of selecting the parts of the Constitution that best support your worldview while ignoring those that preclude your policy preferences.

I was encouraged to stake my claim to the phrase. I happen to like it better than "Situational Constitutionalism" so consider the claim staked. but, alas, a quick google search and it seems I'm a few months too late.

I understand that this becomes a pretty weak blogpost, then,  so to make up for it I give you kittehs playing paddy cake:

Just for Fun Friday: Baseball Edition

Not to rub it in to Mets fans, but I saw this last week and thought it was absolutely hilarious. (If you don't follow baseball, this will not really do much for you. Sorry 'bout that.)

Just for Fun Friday

"Reasons to Date Writers" as critiqued by a writer.

Also, for those of you less amused by writer's humor, the latest internet sensation:

Every Little Step with Mike Tyson & Wayne Brady from Mike Tyson

Just for Fun Friday: Triumphant Return Edition

Hey all. Sorry about the hiatus. My busy time is over, so I'm starting up my research and writing again. This will probably make the blog a little more focused on criminal justice issues, but I hope to still keep it entertaining for the rest of you too.

Anyway, courtesy of  Julian's twitter feed, I give you a collection of animated gifs and music mashups. The audio isn't safe for work, unless melodic F-bombs are cool at your job. Most of the video is safe, though you will see a canine sexually assault a plush toy. You've been warned.

Hopefully I'll have some decent content up next week. Til then, enjoy.


Cache Rules Everything Around Me from Evan Roth on Vimeo.

Just for Fun Friday

Mood Music Monday

Forgive the tardiness. Working on a bunch of stuff today. Should have a real post up Tuesday.

This was inspired by an ex-roomie's post on facebook, an episode of CSI:LA...and because I'm a tall light-skinned brotha with dimples.



Yes, the vid is corny, but he was 19. Give him a break.

Just for Fun Friday: World Cup Edition

GO USA! BEAT THE BRITS!!

Just for Fun Friday

It's pretty goofy, but I enjoyed it thoroughly.

Just for Fun Friday

Today is Pac-Man's 30th birthday. In honor of that, here is an interview with the little yellow hero of my youth.

Enjoy.

H/T Dara Lind

Just for Fun Friday

Ok, so there is a message here too, but I love this bit.

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Back in Black - Glenn Beck's Nazi Tourette's
www.thedailyshow.com
Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor Tea Party

Just for Fun Friday

If you know me, you've probably already seen this video by a couple friends of mine. It's a parody of the Restore Stephen Baldwin project, whose promotional video you can find here. The audio of the parody is marginally NSFW.

Enjoy!

Mood Music Monday

Audio moderately NSFW



Via Julian Sanchez

Just for Fun Friday: Star Wars Edition

Hey, Who Wants to See Jar Jar Binks Savagely Elbowed in the Face?

 

 

Awesome. HT: Brooke Oberwetter